Having a 3D scan has finally made it hit me, I’m having another baby. It sunk in from day 1 that I was pregnant again. Not being able to drink on my hen weekend, wedding day or during my honeymoon to New York made the pregnancy a reality, I had just never looked past the 9 months of expanding waistlines and shrinking social life until now.
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Today I got thinking though, what happens once the pregnancy is over and I bring home baby number 2? How will my little lady cope with not being my baby anymore? How will I cope with no time to do my hair and make up each morning? Will I ever get back in my size 10 clothes? I can feel a panic attack coming on again! This Christmas there will be 4 names on all the cards I send, I will have to buy another Santa stocking to hang on the stairs and there will be another person sitting round table the for the family dinner. This New Year eve’s I will be seeing in midnight as a married mother of 2, how did this creep up on me? I still feel 18 in my head most days, dreaming of packing up and going round the world for a year, and although I think my husband would enjoy some time off from my nagging I like to believe this little family couldn’t function without me.
The thing is, when I sit down and think about all I have given up to be a mother, late night raves, lie-in’s, disposable income, I can honestly say that there is no comparison to all I have gained by having a family. All the nights out from my early twenties are now fading into one big memory, but they day my daughter first smiled at me, the day she took her fist steps, the first time she said mummy, are, and will always be, the most vibrant memories a person could ever have.
So today, almost 3 years to the day of finding out we were expecting our first child, I think I finally feel like a grown up, and I have to say, I quite like it!
What a lovely post
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